Becca Jane St Clair

A strange thing happened to me after I voted. Someone decided to challenge my right to vote, along with many other overseas voters in NINE counties across Pennsylvania. A hearing was set for Friday (I was informed on Wednesday!). I found out the person who was challenging my vote was a prominent member of the Lancaster County Republican Committee who I had never heard of, but after locating their Facebook page, it was clear who they supported. I also verified with Lancaster County that I was registered to vote.

I posted on our facebook group for Pennsylvania Ex-pats, and a half dozen people who voted in Lancaster County replied that they had the same e-mail. One of the members passed me the email address for a lawyer within the PA branch of the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU). The lawyer wrote to me and explained that they were contacting Lancaster County and informing them that if they did not withdraw the challenge, the ACLU would be stepping in and suing the county. Within an hour, I received the following:

Funny how the fear of a lawsuit made the person withdraw their challenge.

I’m glad there wasn’t a hearing because one of the questions they were poised to ask was about my ties to Lancaster…and I have none, other than some cousins and second cousins in other areas of the county. Would have been fun explaining. But, under federal law, overseas voters vote where they last held residency. For me, this is Manor Township, Lancaster County, Pennsylvania.

Hopefully in four years, I don’t have any trouble.

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[This post was written in May, but I never pressed post. OOPS!]
Yes, I know. So did pretty much the entire population of the UK and most of the US, too. You’re probably sick of posts about the lights. But we saw them and it was just incredible.

On Friday, Tim and I were driving back from our friend Jen’s house in Teeside when I scrolled on Facebook and a friend down in Kent posted a picture of the Northern Lights. I started looking out the window while Tim was driving, but as we were on a main road there was a lot of light polution, but I managed to see a few faint streaks of green, so we decided to pull off the road and go down a dark country lane until we could no longer see any lights and we just observed. With the naked eye, we could definitely see green and blue streaks. Tim’s camera took better images than mine, so I’ll include his as well as mine. It was amazing. It was a once in a lifetime chance and something that Tim had never seen before in his life (I saw them when I was in a Northern part of Canada years ago).

To our surprise when we got home, we could see them from our driveway! More images were taken, and as it was already well past 1 in the morning, we stayed awake a little longer and I went outside around 3 and it was even brighter than it had been.

Seriously, what an incredible sight to see.

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I used to post a lot about my Slimming World journey. As some of you know, I did manage to lose a bit of weight through Slimming World, then gained some of it back and struggled quite a bit. Then, the pandemic hit and I felt that there wasn’t really much support out there and I decided not to return after the pandemic, and especially after they upped their prices! I know Slimming World struggled during the pandemic and they tried creating virtual meetings via Zoom and giving us half-price meetings if we already had purchased a countdown before they had to shut down groups, but I just didn’t feel as though there was support. We obviously were expected to weigh ourselves at home, too, and I don’t even own a scale because I would honestly step on it multiple times per day to check my weight if I did. And it’s very hard to receive personal attention over a Zoom call. There was nothing personal about it. I don’t even recall our consultant contacting us if we stopped attending the Zoom calls. I certainly felt as though the £45 I paid the week before we had to stop meetings was completely wasted!

But let’s get back to my struggling. When I first joined SW, my goal was to get my weight down to a weight that a doctor told me I needed to get down to for a procedure. I got down to the weight I was told, and they basically told me I hadn’t that I actually needed to lose more and get down to an amount that I wasn’t comfortable weighing. But I returned to Slimming World anyway and I struggled whenever we would get told to “remember why you walked through that door.” or “remember your goal”, because I no longer actually had a tangible goal.

I also struggled with “do you know why you gained weight?”/”Do you know why you didn’t lose anything this week?” because I felt like it was shaming people for the choices they made throughout the week. If it was my birthday, anniversary, or heck, just a bad day and I wanted to have a piece of cake…I was going to have the piece of cake.

We got told to “eat in moderation”, yet foods like pasta, rice, and potatoes were “unlimited”…talk about a carb overload! Speaking of carbs, I actually did lose 30lbs before I joined Slimming World by cutting out carbs entirely. Even now, I don’t eat pasta as often as I used to, and rarely rice, but I do like potatoes and bread. Other “unlimited”, sorry, “free” foods included yogurt brand Mueller Light and people were not discouraged from eating an entire 6 pack of yogurts in one day. Pickled onions were also considered “free”. I’m allergic to onion so I never ate them, but you would see people posting pictures of the weirdest plates with their little onion garnish.

Packet of lunchmeat? Fine. Eggs? Fine. Apples? Fine. Banana? Fine. But don’t you dare put that banana in a blender or press the juice out of the apple. Now it’s synned. A tin of chickpeas was fine, but if you roasted chick peas, you guessed it…synned.

Now I’m not saying that the plans don’t work. I’m sure they do for some people, and I know people who have had great success on the plans. In fact, I have an entire category on my blog dedicated to my experiences on Slimming World and recipe sharing. The problem is, you pretty much have to be on the plan for life. The “maintain” part of the plan involves you weighing in every week and if you fall above or below something like 3lbs off your original goal, you either get put back on the plans, or told to eat more.

And the plans just don’t work if you have other dietary restrictions. For example, people who require Gluten Free foods will struggle on the plans. As a diabetic, I struggled because a lot of the “free” foods still had quite a bit of sugar in them, including the yogurts. I’m allergic to onions (and garlic), so that made some of the recipes hard to follow as a lot of them rely on adding a ridiculous amount of either. I’m also allergic to maple syrup, so can’t use that as a sugar alternative. If you can’t drink cow milk, you can’t use almond milk as your dairy option. In fact, I don’t even know what someone would do if they were both gluten and lactose intolerant as one of the big daily requirements is a Healthy A (dairy) and a Healthy B (Bread/Wheat).

The plans also struggle to cope with any amount of exercise or training above just going on a walk. In fact, they claim you don’t need to do any exercise at all and you will still lose weight. I recently started running, and I know that if I was still at SW I would get reprimanded for a “gain”, when actually, I’ve lost inches on my waist and hips and the fat on my calves has all been converted back into muscle.

I also know some people who developed eating disorders because of Slimming World and the idea of “binging” on pasta or potatoes. or the idea that meeting night is also “cheat night” so you could stuff your face after the meeting and it wouldn’t matter because you’d get right back on the plan on the following morning. We were encouraged instead of using our 15 “syns” per day, that it was ok to save them up for one big meal during the week instead. My own view of food is pretty skewed and I barely make pasta anymore because I feel like I used to make too much pasta but I ate it anyway because it was “free”.

But no, I shouldn’t completely poo poo on Slimming World. I have made several really good friends through the group who I still talk to regularly. I gained confidence in cooking and creating recipes. And yes, I did lose some weight, even if I’ve put some of it back on.

But I won’t be returning to Slimming World, or Weight Watchers, or any of the other “weight loss plans” that claim they aren’t diets while being diets.

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DISCLAIMER: I do not work for Slimming World, I am not affiliated with Slimming World beyond being a paying customer/member, I get no personal benefit from writing this post other than the joy of sharing.

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I have not received compensation from any companies mentioned in my post.

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Today should have been Aunt Janie’s 92nd birthday, so I thought I would share some words I wrote after her death a few weeks ago when I saw that the obituary provided by the funeral home wasn’t quite up to standards.

I was unable to attend any services for Aunt Janie since I only found out a few days before the burial, with no time to try to organize flights, accommodation, etc., but I’ve tried to make peace with it.

Catherine Mary Jane Sweitzer (Janie) passed peacefully on February 18th. She was 91. Janie was born and raised in York County and attended William Penn Senior High. She was a lifelong member of the First Presbyterian Church, where she also worked as a secretary until her retirement in the 1990s. Janie enjoyed reading, puzzle books, and sewing. Her favourite books were historical Christian romances and her favourite colour was pink. She liked tigers, but wasn’t a fan of domestic cats. Roses were her favourite flower, and she always used rose scented soap. She enjoyed making clothing for both herself and her family, including prom dresses and wedding dresses. She enjoyed travelling with her brother, including once to the Rose Bowl where she sat and talked with people instead of watching the game. Janie also enjoyed baking, and a Christmas staple was her Red Velvet Cake!

Janie was predeceased by her parents, Emory Sr and Rozadie, sisters Marcella, Beatrice, Barbara, Patricia, and Jesselean, and brothers Emory Jr and William. She is survived by her sister, Linda, and many nieces and nephews spanning several generations.

Janie enjoyed hosting the annual Thanksgiving dinner for our extended family and organizing the post-meal bingo game. Her favourite flavour of ice cream was coffee, which she especially enjoyed with a slice of mince pie.

Janie was an avid walker, and would go on daily walks either to one of the local parks, or if it was raining, she would walk around the mall. She loved Doris Day and Sandi Patti. She also loved watching Oprah, and particularly enjoyed the giveaway shows.

Aunt Janie introduced me to some of my favourite books – Anne of Green Gables, CS Lewis, and Harry Potter. She made my senior prom dress over a weekend, and helped mom and I make my wedding dress in six weeks. Every Summer growing up, I always looked forward to my week long stay with Aunt Janie. She would take the week off from work and we would spend the week playing board games, visiting the ducks at Kiwanis Lake, or the miniature ponies.

On mowing day, she would make a container of lemonade to quench her thirst and every evening she could be seen snacking on pretzels and cheese and drinking a Dr Pepper. Aunt Janie made the best grilled cheese sandwich I have ever had.

Aunt Janie encouraged me in all of my endeavours. I don’t think she missed a single recital, concert, or theatrical production I was in unless it was mid-week. She always came to visit on the weekends I was singing in church and would ask for recordings of my singing.

She will be forever missed, and always loved.

I love you. So very much.

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I feel like the luckiest girl right now. Not only did I get to go down to London to watch the red carpet for the Star Trek Picard premiere, but I was handed tickets to the actual premiere!!!

So, let me backtrack. BTW, this post will contain NO SPOILERS for Episode 1, but will mention things like cast (which has been announced for ages). I won’t be offended if you click out and come back on Friday after you watch the first episode.

When I first heard about the premiere happening in London, I immediately checked trains and sighed. The first train of the day wouldn’t have arrived early enough for the 8AM wrist band distribution, and I couldn’t get anyone to pick one up for me, so I was pretty sure I was out of luck. Until I decided to go down the night before on Tuesday.

I arrived to the theatre around 0645 in the morning after a not so great night of sleep. My friend John had been there since 6, and there was about 6-8 people standing around. Weirdly, the majority were actually autograph hounders/dealers…and it had never crossed my mind to bring something to get signed!(oh well). John and I recieved our wristbands and I was #4!

We were told to come back around three to be let into the viewing pens, but John and I decided we didn’t want to stray too far. Of course, it was now just past eight in the morning, so we headed to a Costa for a coffee and wound up hanging around chatting for about an hour, maybe two. John was told they might be giving out tickets to the event, too, so we became hopeful.

After our coffee, we headed back towards the cinema and watched set up for a while until we decided we were getting cold and decided to have an early lunch.

After lunch, we headed back to the park and basically just hung around some more until around 2 in the afternoon, when John suggested we get another hot drink and utilize toilets (it wasn’t his first premiere!). Naturally, we drank Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. By this time, the wind had really picked up and where we were told to wait for our escort was basically in a wind tunnel. BRR. We hoped we would feel warmer once we were in the viewing pen with the others, but they had only given out about 60 out of the 400 wristbands so far.

They put us in the pen around three, with guests set to arrive around five, so we basically spent the two hours standing up against the fence watching set-up finish.

The evening finally got underway with a bit of entertainment for the crowd, and a giveaway of the new comm badge we see in Picard made by Fan Sets. As they were going down the line, I held up Mini Picard because, I mean, I had a Mini Picard on me. I got the Emcee’s attention and he came over and we had some interaction and he gave me a pin and asked me to take a picture with the minis and post it to instagram.

He then started doing an easy quiz to pick people to win tickets into the actual premiere. I wasn’t super hopeful that we would get in because he wasn’t over in our direction, but then there were two guys – one dressed in a TOS uniform and on in a TNG uniform who were duking it out for “best Trek series” and I was heckling the TOS Guy (“Why did you come to a Picard premiere then?” etc) and the Emcee came back to us because he forgot to give John a badge. And then….the best thing…he handed us tickets into the premiere! I hugged him.

Then, the red carpet got underway!

My only complaint about the red carpet walk was that they decided to bring the ticket holders through on the same side we were standing on, so we sometimes had to stretch and crane our heads to watch the arrivals. A better plan would have been to have the ticket holders go in on the other side, especially as it seemed that was where they were directing people to watch the red carpet arrivals. But oh well. So my pictures didn’t come out as great as I would have hoped, but I grabbed a few.

The first arrival was Michelle Hurd, who immediately came through on our side to do signings and selfies.

Jeri Ryan also arrived, and I got to tell her I thought her dress was gorgeous. A few more arrivals from the cast arrived (my photos turned out terrible) and then the man himself arrived!

I also was excited to see Sir Ian arrive to support his friend and I got to witness their reunion, but again, my photos turned out pretty bad. (but there are plenty online!)

…and then my phone battery completely died! Fortunately, I had my battery box along and I quickly plugged in and turned back on my phone.

I won’t go into the bad experience I had just after Patrick Stewart walked past me, that will be in a separate post. But shortly after, an obnoxious man started shouting “Jason, Jason, Jason” over and over at Jason Isaacs, who was in the middle of giving an interview. He walked over and said “WHAT?” to the man, followed by “I heard you shouting my name for ten minutes.” and then he promptly ignored the guy and I got to say hello to him and tell him that #TeamBasement (his unofficial fan club he knows about) said hello, and he told me to tell them hello back, and did I want a selfie to share with them?

…Uhm, YES.

The red carpet (Well, white and silver!) portion ended, and most of the people left, except for those of us who were given tickets to go inside. They let us in and John and I climbed…and climbed…and climbed. Row Q was at the very top of the balcony level…but it didn’t matter, we were IN!

Patrick Stewart and Alex Kurtzman took to the stage and welcomed us, and Patrick asked us not to spoil anything we saw that night, and Alex added that we could after Thursday (US release date), so I will not be adding any spoilers for the first episode other than to say that it was amazing and I’m really excited for the series. The show was dramatic and it had it’s funny moments and at one point we heard Ian loudly exclaiming in surprise!

After the episode, we go to have a Q&A with the cast who was present, although that did contain spoilers as well.

And then, the evening was over, and I found my friend Duncan, who said he wanted to talk to me for his podcast. You can hear me in The Line, available on Trek.fm!

I made a quick detour to check out Picardilly Circus before heading to King’s Cross and my train back home.

I managed to catch the Portal 47 folks briefly on our monthly Euro call to tell them about the evening, and then I napped the whole way home.

What a night!

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Tickets to the premiere of Star Trek Picard and the Fan Set’s delta badge provided by Amazon Prime UK.

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Two weeks ago, I got my first tattoo! There’s a story behind the design, but I’ll get to that a bit later as I really wanted to walk through my experience for anyone curious about getting a tattoo.

My first suggestion is to go with a tattoo artist your tattooed friends recommend, especially if you like their tattoos. I wound up getting my tattoo over 100 miles away in Middlesborough at Skins and Needles because my friend Jen had tattoos from there and she was going in to have colour added to hers and asked if I wanted to get mine at the same time. I also had recommendations for a place in Essex, but that was a little too far away. Plus, I see my friends in Middlesborough pretty regularly, so if I had any problems or it needed a touch up it would be easy to arrange.

We arrived for our appointment and the first thing the artist, Lotti, did was talk to me about my design. Placement, size, and even double checked with me that I knew my tattoo would look “upside down” to other people (but be right side up for me). She tweaked the design another friend had made and made sure I was ok with the new size, though she also explained her reason was so that the stars would stand out better. I Ok’ed the design, and she headed off to the printer and came back with the stencil – which was basically a rub-on version of my design. This was my last chance to change my mind on location and size.

I should also mention the sterilisation/cleanliness – The bed was completely sanitised and covered with plastic, the instruments were sanitised and covered in plastic, and she wore rubber gloves ever time she touched my arm. The entire shop was very clean, and I felt 100% comfortable.

She also shaved a bit of arm hair that might have been in the way of my tattoo and cleaned my arm with alcohol swabs before placing the pattern on.

Getting the actual ink took about 20-25 minutes because it was small and only one colour. It barely hurt – in fact, I could feel the heat of the needle more than any pain, except for the part right across my wrist tendons. That part was very tender and I said “Ouch!” a few times. Interesting, there was a man sitting at a chair across from me who seemed to be having more pain than me!

After she was finished, she wrapped me in clingfilm and gave me instructions to keep the plastic on for 2-3 hours (which I learned was VERY HOT since it was a hot day!), then it was fine to keep it uncovered. I also received a sheet of instructions on how to care for my new tattoo, and I have followed them to the letter.

I was told to use Palmer’s Cocoa Butter on it first, and once the shiny skin came through switch to E45. Because of the placement, I was advised not to submerge it in water for the first week or so, so rubber gloves were purchased. I also decided to cover it with plastic in the shower, but only because of the Hibiscrub that I need to use for my Hidradenitis. Once my tattoo is completely healed (which it almost is!) I won’t cover it in the shower.

It honestly has been a lot easier of a process than I thought – possibly because I got a small tattoo and a black tattoo. I don’t know what the recovery time for a coloured tattoo would be. It probably also helped that I am used to having blood drawn, and needles barely make an impact. I think if you were more sensitive to having blood drawn, getting a tattoo might hurt more.

So on to what my tattoo signifies, since it shocked a lot of my friends that it wasn’t Star Trek or Harry Potter related! I’ve wanted a tattoo for many years, probably since I was in my early 20s. I wanted to get something for my dad, who passed away when I was thirteen, and I knew I wanted it to incorporate the constellation Orion because when my dad died, Orion was the brightest star in the sky when my youth pastor took me outside to look at the stars. in Particular, Orion’s belt.

my facebook post about my tattoo.

I have LOADS of Orion images saved and even tattoo ideas. I thought about getting the stars as dots only on my arm, I thought about getting the constellation joined up, I had all sorts of ideas.

A friend on a cat page posted an elegant tattoo they got which was a cat’s body made to look like a treble clef. I really liked it and I was talking to my friend, Babs, about it and that I thought it would be neat to do and add Orion’s belt and maybe a leaf for the band, Carbon Leaf. To my great surprise, my friend sent me three drawings she did based on my idea and I sat on them for a further two more years before finally getting my tattoo!

I’m really glad I waited to make sure I really wanted a tattoo and this one in particular….but I’m already thinking about #2, and Babs is already drawing!

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The past year for our family has been…a bit of a rollercoaster. There have been some amazing things that happened, but underneath it all was a level of darkness. I don’t want to give out a lot of details because it’s not my place to decide what information is made public, and of course, out of privacy for people involved.

On Saturday, May 12, 2018, Tim’s younger brother was in a serious cycling accident. He was doing a charity ride up Great Dun Fell with some of his friends. They reached the summit, and then on the descent his bike skidded in some gravel, and came off his bike.

He was airlifted from Cumbria to Middlesborough to the neurological specialists at James Cook Hospital. He was in a coma when he arrived. I imagine they rushed him straight into surgery, but I didn’t arrive until around 10PM.

I had been in Nottingham for the day, planning on seeing Sunny Ozell perform. I was hanging out around the venue when I received a phone call from Tim’s mother that she needed to speak to Tim right away. I can’t remember why Tim hadn’t answered his phone – he might have been on nights and sleeping. I asked if everyone was ok, and only got told that there had been an accident….now, if you know me and know my history – those are words that strike fear in me. Those are the words spoken to my mom and I the day my father died. So….panic.

I texted Tim, PMed him on Facebook, and was nearly about ready to ask my friend with a key to our house to go over and let themselves in to wake him when he responded to me. He spoke with his mother and called me back to tell me he was driving his mom and sister up to Middlesborough and he asked if I could meet him there. So we looked up trains and I figured out a way there, grabbing whatever food I could from the food trolly on the train – I actually remember having a cup of coffee, a kit kat bar, and a bag of crisps. Highly nutritional, let me tell you! I also remember plugging my earphones into my tablet and watching three episodes of TNG on the train as I couldn’t concentrate on reading.

When I arrived at 10, we still had no information. Tim’s brother’s wife and her dad were there along with Tim, his mum, and sister. We finally were spoken to sometime after midnight by the surgeon, and it wasn’t a very pleasant conversation. We were let in to see him, and I think we all thought this was it. Of course, we would have many more moments like this over the course of the year.

We got to a hotel in Middlesborough around 230 in the morning with nothing but the clothes on our backs. The hotel (The Holiday Inn in Middlesborough) was amazing to us. They gave us free toiletries and water bottles, found us a phone charger to borrow, and even gave us a reduced rate. In the morning, we were told to take whatever we waned from the breakfast area, so we grabbed plenty of food for the rest of the family still over at the hospital. I spent about an hour on a Sunday morning wandering around an unfamiliar town centre looking for a Boots and a Primark – Tim needed shaving supplies, we both needed deodorant, and we needed clean clothes. Tim had thrown on the first clothing he could find at home that day, and it happened to be his gardening jeans. Fortunately, I found some inexpensive Cargo pants at Peacocks, and I picked up a clean shirt for myself.

We found out his brain was swollen. They removed part of his skull to allow for the swelling to calm down (he’d get a titanium plate later). He had fluid in his lungs, which turned into multiple lung infections. At one point, doctors asked us to think about “what he wants”. I can look back in the messages I sent to my best friend and read the despair in them.

And thus began our lives for the next six weeks – twice weekly trips to Middlesborough with the occasional overnight and one emergency overnight when the trains were cancelled stranding us in York. We got to the point that we kept a change of clothes in the car with toiletries for Tim in case he needed to go straight from work, and anytime I left the house, I threw in toiletries and clean underwear into my backpack just in case of an unexpected trip up north.

We hated when the phone rang, even more so if it was during “unsocialable” hours. Our lives came to a total standstill, not knowing from one day to the next what was going on or going to happen.
We were both totally drained. Like, barely functioning at this point. Each day when we came home from the hospital, we collapsed into bed for 8-12 hours and then were zombies the next day….only to do it all again a day or two later. Tim took a few days off from work here and there, but we tried to organize our trips up around his days off – which also meant we no longer had a social life. A small price to pay, I know. But being cut off from your friends isn’t very fun, especially when you need their support.

We shortened our Summer holiday. We originally had been planning a two-week trip to visit the Harz, but we shortened it to just one week with full knowledge that we might get called home if anything happened. We still managed to enjoy ourselves, but we also felt so guilty for going away.
A bed became available a little closer to home – Nottingham – and Tim and I were there the day they transported him down, taking with us some of his personal belongings so they wouldn’t get lost in the shuffle.
He stayed there for a few months in different units – at one point he was in his own private room due to the lung infections until he was finally moved to Lincoln.

Now, due to my own illness that seemed to never quit, I haven’t been to see him many times in Lincoln, but Tim tries to go twice per week as long as he’s not at work. Some days are good visits, others aren’t so good.
Parts of it aren’t my story to tell, and I still want to respect his privacy by not putting in too many details, but I did want to write something as we arrive at the one year mark from a life-changing event. Some lives (Tim’s brother, his brother’s wife, and their kids) are changed more than ours, but it’s still very life changing….and we’re only now beginning to come out of the black cloud that seemed to be following us around for months on end.

I’m also extremely grateful we have the NHS. Out of pocket, all the family has had to pay for so far in regards to his hospital stays has been parking at the hospitals, food/transportation/lodging to visit (We personally probably spent around £500 those first weeks), and that’s been it. All of Ben’s care – from the air ambulance to the surgeries to the medications to the hospital stay – have been covered. Seriously. I don’t understand why the US can’t wrap their heads around nationalised health being a good thing.

For those of you who knew about this this past year and have sent positive thoughts, vibes, prayers, smoke signals, etc, I thank you for your continued support.

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At Destination Star Trek in October, I perhaps had one of the best experiences in my life.  I finally met Gates McFadden, the actress behind Doctor Beverly Crusher, and a woman I’ve admired for years.  Trying to put my experience into words is hard because there are so many emotions attached to this moment, but let’s go back a few months…

It was around January 2018 and Destination Star Trek announced that Gates would be one of the guests.  I burst into tears when I read the news, booked a hotel, and booked tickets.  Then, the loooong countdown began.  Somewhere in the middle, I started up the Twitter account @gates_daily, originally to mark the time while Gates was taking a brief hiatus from Twitter, and then it took off with a mind of its own and Gates herself has retweeted some of the pics I’ve managed to find.

So, armed with running a page basically dedicated to her, and our interactions on Twitter…I was nervous to meet her.  I also knew we wouldn’t have a lot of time to talk initially because DST would probably be rammed and the “gatekeepers” wouldn’t let you through the line unless you paid for an autograph.  So  I wrote her a letter telling her how much she meant to me and a little about myself and put together a small package – some vegan snacks and a pair of cat slippers (because I mean, cats!)  When I handed it over to her I was shaking and the first time I met her I went to introduce myself and she said “I know who you are!”  I about died.   She was signing my (first) item, a trading card of Beverly Crusher as drawn by Lee Sargent,  and the person behind was trying to push in.  Gates turned to her helper and told her she needed to keep the next person from crowding as I was special. (!!!)  She then saw MiniBev and MiniPicard stuck in my cleavage and laughed because as she says,“Picard is a breast man” and she saw the lamp (Ronin) and thought it was hilarious.    She also told me how much she loves and appreciates her dedicated Twitter crew.

On Friday, I also did my picture with her and she made sure the photographer got the lamp in the pic. (haha!)    She told us she was funnier at 4AM, but she was still in good spirits.

Tim and I spotted a print of the TNG cast as cats playing poker out of the TNG Cats book and I decided to be really silly and I had Gates sign the poster for Hexe & Merddin.  She thought it was a brilliant idea and then had Tim get her a poster, too. (funny side story – she handed Tim an old fiver and Tim had to tell the poster guy it was for Gates for him to take the old note).  So she had me stand to the side while we waited for Tim to come back and we chatted some more about things I can’t really remember.

Saturday, we didn’t have a lot of time to talk as it was the busiest day of the con and I spent about an hour trying to get our photoshoot with more than three people approved.  I tried to get through to Gates, but couldn’t without paying so finally got it approved by the photographer if we were the last pic of her session.

We walked in and Gates saw us, looked at me, and and just mouths “Oh my God”   followed by “I don’t know them!”  I think we amused her and we explained we should have been more people, but some people backed out.   She might have wanted to talk to us more, but she was called away to do some other photos.  When she signed my pic later, there was more giggling.

Sunday was quiet when we got in and I asked if I could go and talk to Gates and was told it was fine since there wasn’t a crowd.  Nick had asked me to pass on a message and I just wanted to thank her again for the day before.  Gates read my note, too and told me she loved the card and it was “so you” (it had a ginger cat wearing glasses on it and was glittery) and we talked about my letter a bit and she told me how strong I was to have gone through everything I had been though and she was glad to have been a part of my support network even if she didn’t know it. She sympathised with me over a few personal things I told her and she even made a comment about how much in love Tim and I looked.  I passed on Nick’s message, and she gave me a hug.

Then, it was on to the TNG panel and somehow her eyes tended to go in my direction where I was snapping pics at a furious rate to try to get some good shots for @gates_daily.

I didn’t get to talk to her again. I was going to go up to her table  to say goodbye, but I decided I didn’t want to become a nuisance.

And I’m still on cloud nine three months later.

***
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About a week ago, I received an alert about a gala event happening in support of Unique Voice, a charity in Bristol that works with schools and the community to “empower children emotionally through the use of Drama and the Arts” (source: About Us section of their website). Their Patron is Sir Patrick Stewart, and he would be hosting their Summer Gala.

I wanted to go.

With everything that’s been going on, and all the other things we have planned this year, it wasn’t looking like a possibility until someone close to me decided they wanted to purchase a ticket for me to attend. They have asked that I not say publicly who they were, but they are someone I love very much. My ticket arrived in my inbox a few days ago, and I became excited.

I decided to wear my LindyBop dress because it gives me confidence and I love the way it looks on me. I wore it with the underskirt this time for extra poof, and added a little feathery blue clip in my hair to try to dress it up a bit. I didn’t clean up too bad if I say so myself!

I was sat at a table with 9 strangers, but fortunately, they were all amazing and immediately drew me into their fold as they all knew each other. I can’t remember everyone’s names (sorry!) but table 9 had a blast. We shared stories and laughed and it was like I had been friends with these people for years and not just minutes.

One of the organizers recognized me from my Twitter photo and we had a short conversation with a promise to talk later, but we sadly never got the chance…but I’m sure I’ll be around again as I really like this charity and wish we lived closer to Bristol so I could work with them!

There were signs on the table telling us not to ask Patrick for selfies, but to take photos and to share them on social media. I took a few from my vantage point that didn’t really come out the best, but I’ll share them here anyway.

After dinner, Patrick was coming around to the individual tables to talk to everyone – the room had 13 tables of 10, but at least two of the tables were all people related to/working with the organisation, so it was an intimate gala. When he got to our table, he was on the other side from me and chatting and one of the men at our table said “She’s come all the way from New Jersey to see you!” I called back “He’s lying, I live here, I promise,” but Patrick Stewart came over to speak with me. His hand came down on the back of my chair and he said, “You know, I used to be married to someone from New Jersey.” I answered back in the only way I possibly could – “Well, then on behalf of my home state, I do apologize.” He laughed and stretched out his hand to shake mine.

Our minute was over…or was it?

During the auction, I was trying to win one of the items – all winning bidders would get a picture with Sir Pat – but it got too high for me. Especially when he auctioned off breakfast with him the following morning and it went for £350!

The rest of the night there was dancing, drinking, and talking to my new group of friends. After the Gala, we went to a speakeasy, and that was a new experience for me too.

In the morning, I had breakfast in the same restaurant Patrick Stewart was in, and after I was standing outside waiting for my taxi and he came out. He had his suitcase, and we made polite conversation. We both were complaining about how long it was taking our taxis to show up and he said he was trying to catch a train at a specific time. Since I have the ability to take whatever train I want, I offered him my taxi when it showed up first. He thanked me, and I had another handshake.

Ironically, his taxi turned up only about 30 seconds later. When I got to the railway station, I needed to speak with the gate attendant to be waved through the barriers. Who was standing there talking to the man? None other than Patrick Stewart! I made some silly joke about meeting again, and we both went through the barriers and started heading in the same direction. More jokes about “I’m not following you/You’re not following me” and the like and it turned out we would be boarding the same train. We both went into the waiting room, but when they called our train, I noticed he went out the door for the opposite platform.

When I didn’t spot him on the platform, I thought I had better let him know, so I walked over to him and gently tapped him on the shoulder to let him know. He thanked me with a hand pressed against my shoulder and another handshake.

These small encounters with one of my absolute favourite actors will stay with me for a long time, even without photos of the event. Who can forget getting three handshakes within a 12 hour span?

***
First two images from Unique Voice on Twitter.

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(Yes, I took this in the loo on the train.)

Over the weekend, my husband and I did a whirlwind of things – we went up to Yorkshire, we went to London, and we even made it to Wales. But my worst experience out of the whole weekend had to be our visit to the London Festival of Railway Modelling at Alexandra Palace. Now, my problem had nothing to do with the show itself – in fact, I enjoyed the layouts (when I could get in to see them) and I got to meet a Twitch streamer Tim and I watch and while we only purchased a single book at the show, there were plenty of stands we would have made purchases at if we had unlimited spending!

My problem was with the people attending the show. More specifically, with men.

Whenever we attend these more generic modelling shows, I never see a lot of women, unless they are assisting their husbands with their stands or being dragged around by a child or spouse. This means there is never a queue for the loo, but it also means that seeing a woman is a rarity. Probably even more rare to find one wearing a skirt (my preferred clothing choice). But it doesn’t excuse the behavior of some of the men I encountered.

I got looked at. Looks, I can handle, and I’ll even smile back. But a double take? Inappropriate. Looking a third time and then doing a weird winking, tongue clicking “here’s looking at you, kid” kind of thing….not ever appropriate. Nor is it appropriate to repeat it a second time.

It also is OK if you accidentally brush up against breasts when you’re trying to move in a crowd. You just apologize to the person and you’re fine. It is, however, not OK to either not apologize or smirk. 50% of the population (give or take) have boobs. Those of us with boobs know they can get in the way and know it’s usually an accident if someone brushes against them. Also, while we’re on the subject – boobs are there and there’s nothing those of us with them can do to conceal them, so looking down someone’s top is also not appropriate.

In addition to the incidents above (of which I was boob brushed at least three times and I actually yelled at the triple take tounge clicker the second time), there also was the rude shoving. One guy was even pressed up against my back trying to shove past me and that’s just not on. USE YOUR WORDS. Say excuse me if you need to get by, or wait your turn. At one point, the crowd was getting thick and I was following Tim and there was another couple about a foot away from me and this man just decided to barge past us and shoved me (and touched my boob in the process). I mean…really? It’s a model rail show. THE MODELS AREN’T GOING ANYWHERE. With the exception of a few bespoke items, chances are the stands aren’t going to run out of whatever it is you wanted to buy.

So here are my tips for attending railway shows. Or sci-fi conventions. Or…you know what…these are just general tips for being in groups of people —

1. Don’t ogle people.
2. If you accidentally touch someone, apologize.
3. Don’t ogle people.

Simple!

***

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I’ve been a user of the internet in all of its many forms since the mid 90s, and since then I have had my fair share of trolls and mean comments – usually simple one offs like “I don’t like your voice” left on a video (which is ironic when I have acted and sang semi professionally!). But in my history of using the internet and becoming a content creator, I can count on one hand the number of people who just don’t know when to stop and start to become a nuisance . The first incident happened around 15 years ago and was a guy my husband and sister dubbed “Batteries” and things got so bad with him and his threats that I did have to go to the police. The second was about 10 years ago, and it might have been more than one person but at any rate, the result was *me* getting banned from a useful website I posted on and I had to speak with the police about the harassment. Then we delve into the land of psycho expats with more than one just losing their shit and stalking several fellow expats…and now we get to the most recent, ridiculous harassment/trolling efforts of someone who…well, they’re anon as far as I know. They do have internet handles, but I’m not going to mention them out of politeness.

Here’s where we get to the title of my post – Renting space in your brain. It’s incredible how ONE SINGLE COMMENT can kill you. For example, ONE music director in 2002 didn’t like my voice and I didn’t sing for 10 years. These comments weren’t about my singing, but another way I contribute to the arts – these comments were on the words I wrote.

The first comment came in September on my account over on Fanfiction.net. It was from a fellow “author”, and it was nasty and harrassive. FFN doesn’t let you remove nasty comments from registered users, so I simply deleted (And later re-posted) the story the comment had been left on and blocked the user id. Speaking to a fellow reader, I found out that the author in question “does this to any author who writes better than them and has a following”. Ok, so it was down to sheer jealousy then. Fine, whatever. I kept publishing.

I made the move to Archive of Our Own a few months ago after I finally got my invite to the site. I moved over much of my fic from FFN, but I also made an announcement on FFN that I was going to be posting on AO3 and if I wasn’t updating on FFN, to check me on AO3 and I listed my AO3 pseudo – AnnaOnTheMoon.

AO3 allows you to screen comments before they are posted, and a few came in from a person. Again, they were filled with harassment and well, they tried to tell me what I should write. Like, telling me “You need to write blahblahblah and blahblahblah needs to happen.” My response wanted to be “Go write it yourself”, but instead I just deleted the messages, figuring they would get the hint that I wasn’t interested in their “orders”. Other readers left comments requesting different storylines and if I felt I could write them, I did.  But when someone demanded I do something or another…no. AO3 doesn’t have a block feature, so I just had to delete the comments as they came in.

Finally, they stopped using their registered profile, and swapped to posting anon. And funny enough, the only reason I found out they were the same person was due to what they wrote in their comments when they referenced “a lack of negative feedback”.  Now, why would you assume someone even had negative feedback unless you had been the one who tried to leave it in the first place under your other nom de plume?

It was at this point I turned to getting advice from Author Dayton Ward on Twitter:

Dayton Ward was right. Just ignore, ignore, ignore. Don’t let them have space in my brain. But…it was hard. Especially with the comments that were coming through. At one point, they seemed to blame me for the entire Picard/Crusher fandom.

They decided that a fic I wrote called “The Comment Box” was about them. The fic itself was a tongue in cheek story about the ridiculous comments that are posted on Trek pages. Their response? Dedicating a story to me (and a friend of mine who is a big supporter of my writing.)

They thought they were writing an opt-ed. Uhm…no.  They also decided to steal my own tag of tongue in cheek, because…well, why not.

They admitted they had been reading me on FFN and had been the FFN user I blocked. They claimed to have “Been stalked in high school” (I also should note, that basing their age on what they mention in their own author’s notes, they aren’t much out of HS) and yet they decided to stalk me. (oh, and told me my depiction of stalking was wrong, because the way they were stalked is the absolute only way things ever happen)

The story got weird. I was Queen of the kingdom who churned out shit, but then I also inspire people? But the gem had to have been where I basically get blamed for the entire fandom.

I mean…what now?  But this “fic” was the final straw, and I contacted the AO3 admins and reported the story and the user for harassment.

…but I still can’t get their comments out of my head.  It’s poisoned my story, just like it poisoned one of my previous stories.  At this point, I want to either abandon the story (and the series as it’s second in a series), or delete it.  But if I delete it, I doubt I’ll ever re-write it, so then that also means that months of work will just be down the toilet because I can’t evict this asshole from my brain.

++

*sigh* Hopefully, by getting this all out, I will be able to evict them once and for all and return to my writing…because how does that phrase go? The best revenge is a life well lived?

***
+Meme made by me, screenshot from Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone
++Meme by Swear Trek
All other screenshots are from Archive Of Our Own or my own Email and Twitter accounts. 

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A little over a month ago, my Google Alert for Patrick Stewart (shut up) went off with an interesting alert – Sir Patrick Stewart would be giving a talk during the Huddersfield Literature Festival. Tickets were £15, and I hadn’t yet seen it pop up on Twitter.

…So I blagged front row tickets. And then I waited…and waited..and waited for the day…and OH, was it worth it!

I had a bit of a panic on Thursday when I started to read the weather report for both Yorkshire and Lincolnshire. Snow. But not until the wee hours, so we would likely be fine. To be on the safe side, we packed sleeping bags, extra warm clothing (hats, scarfs, fleeces), water,and snacks into the back of the car just in case the snow turned into a second Beast and we had to sleep in the car.

Our day started off with a walk through Huddersfield. There was an international food fair going on, so we checked that out and we headed to the Town Hall to make sure we knew where we would need to be and we scoped out the place we were meeting up with some friends for dinner before settling down into a local coffee shop (I’ve forgotten the name!) for a cup of Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. (Naturally.)

We met up with friends for dinner at the Zephyr. None of us were familiar with the place. The food was…ok. I had a Cajun grilled chicken burger and there was no spice at all on my chicken, which was disappointing. But the Strawberry gin was good.

We all were scattered around the auditorium, so we parted in the lobby and Tim and I headed to our seats. I still didn’t think it was real…I would actually see one of my heros live on stage? Talking? Telling us about his life and career?

When Nick introduced Sir Pat, he explained that Patrick agreed to photos during the first five minutes (and he even posed for pics), and then asked for phones/cameras to be put away and asked that it wasn’t recorded. In fact, we were told if anyone did get caught with their phone held up during the talk, they would be kicked out. I did spot one guy on the balcony out of the corner of my eye holding up a phone though, so if any footage gets posted online I’ll link it.

Patrick Stewart was brilliant. He warned us that he didn’t give short answers, so there weren’t a whole lot of questions asked, but the stories the man told…it was worth it. I’d have gladly sat there for another hour..two….three…just listening to his stories. Perhaps one day he’ll publish a memoir (and Mr Stewart, if you’re reading this, Please can I edit it?)

We even got a rare treat! Not one accent,not two, but three accents! Sir Pat imitated a local accent when he was telling us about his interview to receive a scholarship to attend the Old Vic (and apologized for it being bad, though as a non-local I couldn’t tell), and then he gave us “Space, ze final frontiere” in a French accent. I have to say, I’m quite happy Paramount didn’t make him use a French accent! His third accent was a recreation of his role in 1967 on Coronation Street, plating a Fireman from Lancashire.

We also learned his favourite episode is the Inner Light (though the questioner asked “What’s your favourite Enterprise episode, so I’m not sure if the questioner was confused over which series Sir Pat was in!). This is honestly no surprise to me as it is an incredible episode and it’s made even better by the appearance of Daniel Stewart playing his son!

Sir Patrick told us about his early days in acting, about meeting and becoming bezzies with Sir Ian McKellen, and how he felt when he was on the BBC’s Who Do You Think You Are and discovered more about his father. We also learned that the two charities he is patron for are in memory of his parents – Refuge for his mother and Combat Stress for his father.

And speaking of his early days in acting – did you know he lied his way into gaining his scholarship? Naughty Patrick! But I think he paid his debt in full back to Yorkshire in the end when he became Chancellor of the Huddersfield Uni.

I’m still giggling over his (former) hair piece having been flown across the atlantic specifically for his audition for Captain Picard…and then it was never used. While he did mention he wore a hair piece in one episode (Violations, in a flashback Beverly has), he didn’t specify if it was the same one or styled the same way. Hmm. Something to ask him in the future, perhaps?

Sir Patrick said in an interview on BBC Radio Leeds on Thursday that his favourite childhood book was Treasure Island…and I really think he should record an audiobook for it, don’t you?

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All in all, it was an incredible evening. Sadly, I didn’t get to ask him my question. I wanted to ask him to give advice to those of us in the arts (Performing, writing, creating) who face criticism and how you can bounce back from it…but it wasn’t meant to be and I’ll hopefully get to see him again and ask.

It started to snow on the way home. Not a significant amount, but enough to be annoying.

Thanks Huddersfield Literature Festival for having him, and THANK YOU Sir Patrick Stewart for speaking with us!

You are, forever, O Captain my Captain.

***

+Photo by Neil Armstrong.

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It’s a November kind of February…well, now March.

When I woke up on Wednesday before my huband, I left the curtains pulled on the bedroom and glanced at the cats in the spare room on my way to the stairs. They were sharing their perch and both quite avidly watching something out the window. Merddin (the ginger boy) even tried to catch something through the glass. So I looked out and was greeted with:

View from my bedroom window. Yes that sound is wind. #beastfromtheeast #uksnow #uksnowpocalypse2018

A post shared by Rebecca L (@beccajanestclair) on Feb 28, 2018 at 5:44am PST

Snow. Our first major snowfall of the 2017/2018 winter. They’re calling it the Beast from the East with good reason as it stretches all the way from Eastern Russia to nearly cover the entire European continent. It even snowed in Rome!

But let me back up to Tuesday, when we saw minimal snow showers and a squall or two. I happened to be in town to buy a birthday present for my aunt at M&S and when I left the shop, it had started to snow.

The snow continued in little squalls the rest of the day, and we even had one so bad the bus driver could barely see on the drive home, but it wasn’t bad overall. But at 8PM, I received a text from Tesco that my deliver was cancelled due to the snow! I wound up at the local co op where I was lucky to grab a small bottle of milk, and a 6 pack of eggs. No bread.

I went to bed thinking I would catch a bus in the morning to a grocery store since all we got was that piddly amount of snow.

Boy was I wrong!

I was cold. I layered up with thermal tights, thermal leggings, 2 thermal tops, wool and fleece socks…and my brand new Beverly Crusher onesie from Think Geek.

By the time Tim left for work, it was snowing on and off. Then, around 2PM, we seemed to have a blizzard out there.

Wednesday is Slimming World Day for me, and I usually walk to group as it’s not far away. But a recent knee injury has left me getting lifts from my friends, and for group on Wednesday, I asked my consultant if she could pick me up. I’m part of her social team, so I was able to stay to group and help her the entire evening, but not before bundling up for the cold!

My Slimming World consultant picked me up at 4 and we headed to run group as she wasn’t allowed to cancel. But I took a 6 inch ruler outside before I left to measure the snow in the garden, and it was a tiny bit over the top of the ruler.

I also had to have a little bit of fun with MiniBev and MiniPicard.

After Slimming World, we slided our way back home and I walked to the co op once more in the hopes I could pick up the missing essential grocery items. That was a big fat nope. No milk, bread, or eggs. Someone is making a lot of French toast! I did spot this single little icicle though:

When my husband left for work around 11AM for his 2-10 shift, all the hills into Lincoln were closed. He had to park the car up at the Lawn and walk on foot the rest of the way into Lincoln. Once at work, his job took him out to Ancaster, some 20 miles away. His trip home took an hour to get back to Lincoln, and then another hour to get from Lincoln to Dunholme…a distance of only five miles.

Naturally, he was unable to stop for supplies on his way home, so I could only hope the co-op would get a delivery in the morning.

As you can see, the cats are more interested in the electric blanket now than looking out at the snow.

This morning, I was relieved to see we hadn’t had any more snow overnight, however it has now become windy, which means lots of drifting snow. Still, I had hoped the co-op would have been resupplied, but according to a friend, a delivery came in early, but people were buying multiple jugs of milk, loaves of bread, and packs of eggs, leaving the shelves empty by the time I got there.

I did manage to pick up a pack of wraps, some soy milk, some chocolate milk, and a 4-pack of duck eggs. I’ve never eaten duck eggs before, but I’m assuming they will taste relatively the same. I hope. We can use the chocolate milk in our coffee and the soy milk with cereal to save the minimal regular milk for tea.

The village roads are still hit and miss. Two of the main roads (Lincoln Rd and Ryland Rd) seem relatively clear, but Honeyholes lane is a struggle and I heard several streets are still completely impassable, as we simply won’t see a plough on the smaller streets. The footpaths are walkable, if you can keep your balance on the packed down snow, and are most definitely not passable if you use any type of walking aid. The buses are even trying to run limited services again.

I’m hoping to get out tomorrow to get groceries. Tesco graciously gave me some vouchers, but I don’t want to schedule delivery until this mess has passed us over as I wouldn’t want it to get cancelled again!

Short video I took from my bedroom window:

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I know I haven’t updated properly in ages (not since before October, and then it was fanfic for #BevCrusherDay). I’m sorry. I’ve been busy. But right now, I feel like I need to write this post about hatred and fandoms. More specifically, I’m talking about the Star Trek fandom. Call us trekkies or trekkers, I really don’t care…but there’s a whole lot of hate in the fandom right now.

Don’t like the new series? Don’t watch it. You don’t have to watch week after week so you can spread your hate. And you most definitely don’t need to tweet the actors to tell them how much you hate it. No. That’s just…I’m not sure I have words. Now, I haven’t watched all of Discovery yet, because it’s something my husband and I want to watch together and we haven’t had time, so I can only speak based on what I’ve seen on the Facebook groups and Twitter. There is so much of this “this isn’t Star Trek” BS it could fill the Enterprise — all of them. My only response is – Does it have the trek logo? It’s Star Trek. It’s all part of one main franchise, people! And guess what? You don’t have to like ALL of the franchise to be a fan! You don’t even have to like the original series to be a fan!

And speaking of the original series, if I hear one more time “Your series wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for TOS!” Don’t you think we know that? But acknowledging TOS as the granddaddy of our franchise doesn’t mean it has to be my favourite series. And you can’t really compare Discovery to TOS. TOS was made in the 60s, for chrissake. It was the best sci-fi out there FOR ITS ERA. Yes, it has cheesy effects, the storylines are dated, the model ships look funny….but this is how sci fi was done in the 60s. You have to suspend some of your modern ideas when you watch TOS and try to be a person from the 60s watching it. And if you still think its awful, look for other sci fi series from that era and you’ll soon see that TOS was actually the best.

Move forward to the 80s and 90s of TNG, DS9, and VOY and the effects still won’t compare to the resources someone has in 2018. (And I’m saying that as a die hard TNG fan)

Or compare the Harry Potter films with Fantastic Beasts. FB takes place over 50 years before Harry Potter is even born, yet the effects in FB far outstrip HP. Why? Because HP was made in the early 00s, and FB was made in 2016. Yes, just a small time frame of FIVE YEARS separate the last HP film being made from the first FB film, and the effects have gotten better. OR we could look at Rogue One compared to A New Hope. Again, SAME THING. Film and TV makers aren’t going to take steps backwards with effects.

Another ridiculous amount of hate seems to be aimed at women – both fans and actors. It sometimes feels like as a woman, I’m somehow not supposed to like sci fi or have opinions and the female actors only role is to be sexy eye candy. Uhm…how about no? But you see it over and over again and it’s no wonder we had to make our own Feminist Trek group where we actually support each other.

While we’re talking about fandom and Star Trek, I also feel like I need to talk about fanfiction. I love fanfic, I write fanfic, I read fanfic. For those of you who don’t know what fan fiction is – Fan fic is Fiction written by a fan of a TV series, book, film, etc. that uses the characters/setting for their own storyline. And yes, there’s slash (which is pairing same sex characters together who are usually hetero in canon). I don’t write slash, for reasons I’m not going to get into on this post, but I do write a lot of fan fic. I mean, a lot. Most people like it and encourage me, and I love that. But what I don’t like are the people who decide to tell me what I should be writing or what I should do with my characters or even demanding that I explain why I made someone do something…and…no. The whole idea of fan fic is that you do whatever the heck you want to do with the characters and setting. I have one troll in particular…they must really hate me. They leave me PAGES of negative reviews…even told me they don’t like my writing. Fine. Don’t like me, don’t read me. And yet…they still read and still leave comments. Comments that I ignore and delete. I mean, get with the program already. If you don’t like it, don’t read it. Why is this so hard to comprehend?

And the sheer length of some of these comments – It must take them hours to compose…like, really? Don’t you have something better to do? I get that you don’t like my fic, you told me over a month ago. Pretty sure the answer to not liking something is to stop looking at it. Whether we’re talking about TV shows, Films, Books, Fanfic, Blog posts, Twitter posts, FB posts, Youtube videos…etc. I don’t look at things I dislike, why do you?

tl;dr – I think Swear Trek said it best with Picard up there.

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Gifs from Swear Trek, which if you aren’t following them on Twitter, you really should!

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When Tim and I went away to Manchester for an overnight last October, we had no idea that the night we got home would be our last night with our cat, Prudence.

Prudence was Tim’s cat. She had wandered into his garden about 12 years prior and just made herself at home. Tim determined that she must be the cat from Prudential, so Prudence became her name. A few years after I moved, when Pru finally decided I was going to stick aound, she accepted me and she became my cat just as much as she had been Tim’s.

In 2014, she had an operation to remove a tumor from the base of her tail. It was cancerous, and the vet told us if it came back there wasn’t going to be any possible treatment other than to make her comfortable. He couldn’t tell us if we would have 2 weeks, months, or years with her. We decided that we would make the hard choice when she was ready, as we were sure she would let us know when she knew it was her time.

While we were away in Manchester, she started gnawing at her leg. I can still remember (and still have a slight stain from it) the puddle she was sat in when we got home. Her cancer had come back, and it was brutal. We spent the last night together all on the sofa bed in the living room and in the morning said goodbye to her. Instead of cremation, we opted to bury her in the garden.

I was distraught. Being home 90% of the time, she and I were companions. She would usually be in the room with me and we would have our little rituals together. I couldn’t even get to sleep the first few days because there was no fuzzy lump purring on me. I slept cuddling a Bagpuss toy and with a white noise app on my tablet set to a cat purr.

It was during this time we started to plan our trip for our anniversary. We were going to go to Yorkshire to see a lecture by Tim Peake. Unfortunately, Tim had to cancel. But we still had a hotel booked for 2 days in Bradford, so that was when my friend stepped in and invited us to come over and visit her and her 6 cats and to pay a visit to the Yorkshire Cat Rescue. We were going just to visit the cats……Tim, Nicola, and I all had the idea in the back of our head that we would get another cat that weekend, but none of us said this thought out loud to each other.

Once we were at YCR, we started off in the adult cat room. There were nice cats, but none that really spoke to us…..until we got to the kitten room.
In the kitten room, we watched a trio of kittens. A rambunctious boy and 2 girls snuggling together on a bed. One of the girls got plucked out to go to her fur-ever home, leaving the other girl trembling and upset. Since we were allowed to open the pens to play with the cats, I opened up the pen and picked the little girl up. She curled up against my chest and started purring! Not wanting to be outdone, her brother poked his head out and climbed straight onto Tim’s back! We had found our kittens.

Since the kittens were in Keighley and we were in Lincolnshire, we made arrangements for my friend Nicola to pick them up for us and foster them for a day or two, when I would come up on the train to retrieve them.
Tim and I were riding on the Keighley and Worth Valley Railway that afternoon trying to name them. With our girl being a tortoiseshell , we decided she needed a suitably witchy name. With her brother being ginger, I first naturally considered names out of the Harry Potter Universe…..but somehow Hermione didn’t sound like a good fit for her, and Minerva would only suit a grey tabby….so then we started thinking about our favourite places, and we finally settled on Hexe (German for witch). But what would we name the boy? He needed a suitable name to go along with a witch, and we joked about naming him Aslan…..but then Tim was worried I would come home with a third cat, a white kitten we would name Pax (points if you get the references!!). Somwhere along the line we started thinking about engines – and so Merddin got his name after both the Welsh legend (Merlin) and the double fairlie at one of our favourite Welsh narrow gauge railways. Officially, Hexe is Countess Hexe von Fluffington, and Merddin is Merddin Emrys. (though really, I think he should be Sir Merddin Emrys!). Well, I say officially, but you know….they’re cats.

And here we are…..our kittens are turning one today!! I can’t imagine my life without them in it…..but we do still miss our Proodle Doodle (among her other silly nicknames!)

It’s been a learning curve for us, too. Tim hadn’t had a kitten in many years, and I never had had TWO kittens at once! Merddin finally grew into his ears and feet (and boy has he grown!) and Hexe continues to be our little dainty girl who loves her snuggles, but on her own terms!

Happy Birthday Kittens!!!

(I’ve made both a short and an extended edition of their first year. Watch them both below!)

PS: Did I mention our cats came from Yorkshire Cat Rescue? They are an AMAZING home grown charity and they place cats all over the country! So if you’re looking to adopt, consider YCR…plus you cn ride the Keighley and Worth Valley Railway the same day!
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LOL, well, look at that. My first troll. I’m so pleased. Since the poster deleted their comment after they posted it (so it showed up in my email but not on the video), I didn’t get the chance to reply so I thought I would do so here:

Thank you. I really do value the feedback of my viewers, so let me take the chance to give you some feedback of your own: On the bottom of the video there’s a little slider you can slide back and forth to adjust the volume of the videos that you are watching which will help with the “loudness” you are experiencing. As for my voice being “annoying”, you’ll find at the top of your screen in the right side corner a button that has an X on it. If you click on that X, it will close out of what you are looking at and eliminate you having to listen to my “annoying voice”. Problem solved. You’re welcome.

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Regular posts hopefully will resume soon. I’ve not felt like editing much video lately, but I do want to get through the Austria videos and I now have some packing videos I made 5 months ago that should go up too!

The contents of this post, including images are © Rebecca J Lockley and Tim Lockley unless otherwise stated and should not be reproduced without permission. If you are not reading this on http://blog.beccajanestclair.com, my facebook page, Networked Blogs, the RSS feed(s), or through an e-mail subscription, please notify me.

[LJ readers reading this on the LJ RSS feed: Please click on the link at the top of the entry to go directly to my blog to leave a comment, as comments left on the LJ RSS do not get seen by me. Facebook users reading this from my Networked Blogs link can either comment on facebook or on my blog. If you are reading this through an e-mail subscription, you might need to go directly to my blog to view videos and images.]

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I made this video for my friends on the facebook groups after I asked lots of questions about turning the pocket sized Filofax into a purse/wallet.

As you can see, it’s VERY full and with the one ring splitting a bit, I’m really not sure if this is useful or if I will keep using it, but I’m willing to give it a go.

Where to buy*:
Filofax Pocket Finsbury in Raspberry
Pocket Filofax Zipper Envelopes
Pocket Filofax Credit Card Holders
Pocket Filofax Clear Pouch

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*All links lead to Amazon UK and are affiliate links, so if you click on them and buy something, I do get a tiny percent.

This post has not been endorsed by Filofax OR Amazon and I have not received compensation for writing this post or making this video.

The contents of this post, including images are © Rebecca J Lockley and Tim Lockley unless otherwise stated and should not be reproduced without permission. If you are not reading this on http://blog.beccajanestclair.com, my facebook page, Networked Blogs, the RSS feed(s), or through an e-mail subscription, please notify me.

[LJ readers reading this on the LJ RSS feed: Please click on the link at the top of the entry to go directly to my blog to leave a comment, as comments left on the LJ RSS do not get seen by me. Facebook users reading this from my Networked Blogs link can either comment on facebook or on my blog. If you are reading this through an e-mail subscription, you might need to go directly to my blog to view videos and images.]

For full Copyright and Disclaimer, please read http://www.blog.beccajanestclair.com/copyright/

I applied for my Learner’s Permit back in October 2014 because I wanted a photo ID before my trip to the US the following January (Jan 2015) that wasn’t my passport. I might be 36, but I surprisingly get carded in the US. And, of course, I planned on learning how to drive.

In the UK, learning how to drive and getting your license is a three-part process. Well, more than three when you add in everything you need to do.

Step 1: Apply for your provisional. This is really easy and you just go to the Post Office for a form, and send off the application with the fee, a photo of yourself, and your ID (passport if you are foreign). You can send them a self-addressed postage paid envelope to return your documents (I used one with tracking). It only takes about two weeks.

Step 2: Get car insurance. If you have someone else in your house who own a car, ask them to add you as a named driver. All Tim had to do was ring up his insurance (Directline) and it was around an additional £100 to add me for the year and the only difference is I have a higher deductible than Tim. If you have US driving experience and it hasn’t been forever since you had a valid license in the US, some UK insurance companies will accept your no claims bonus, but I haven’t had insurance in the US since 2008 so I didn’t bother. It probably also helped that I’m older than 25.

Step 3: Book lessons. As an experienced driver, I contacted a few local driving schools to ask them what options they had since I know the basics of driving and needed to learn 1) manual transmission and 2) how to drive on UK roads/how to pass the test. I found a school that was willing to offer me the same introductory rates as a new driver, but start me right away behind the wheel (instead of explaining “this is the brake/this is the gas/etc”).

Step 4: Book your Theory test. Apparently, the DVLA has been seriously backed up and in some places it’s taking up to three months just to schedule the theory test. When I went online to schedule mine, I had to schedule it for five weeks away from the date I was booking it because it was the first date available. I would have liked to have taken it sooner, but it gave me plenty of time to study.

Step 5: The actual test for getting your license in the UK has two parts – a written part (Theory) and a behind the wheel part (Practical). Both parts have several sections to them. You MUST pass the theory test before you can even schedule the practical, so step 5 is STUDY. Even if you think you know…study. Tim bought me the study books in a three pack for Christmas, but they are available at WH Smith and online from TSO for about £20 for the three books. I also paid for the official apps for my Android tablet (the guide, the theory test, and the hazard perception test), which I think cost around a tenner for all three, and in addition to all of that, we also bought the Hazard Perception DVD (I had to use Tim’s desktop since my laptop doesn’t have a DVD drive!) Overkill? Actually…..no. I read (most of) the book (I also had a free download on my Kindle I read), and then started in on the practice tests on my tablet. A lot. I failed some, I passed some. It was FRUSTRATING! I even practised the tests while I was soaking in the bathtub! And the night before my test, I took 10 tests (failed one, but all the other ones were passed with plenty of room to spare)

The Hazard Perception test is a separate section to the Theory, and a separate score. You need to pass BOTH sections in order to have passed the theory test, and if you fail one, you retake both. The Hazard Perception is a series of scenarios and you have to click when you see a developing hazard. Sort of similar to that simulation from Driver’s Ed in the 90s with the brake pedal and the ball rolling into the street. In the Hazard Perception test, you can score up to 5 points on each scenario, but one is worth 10 (it’s a double hazard). The later you click, the less points you get…but if you click in a pattern or the computer thinks you are clicking on everything, you don’t get *any* points! There is an app for this, but since you will be taking the test at a computer with a mouse, I felt it would be better to practice on a computer. The DVD cost £15 at WH Smith, so all in all we spent around £45 just on study aids. But this test is tough, and it only has a 50% pass rate for most testing centres! And since you have to pay £23 for the test each time you need to take it…well, you want to study as much as you can and use as many resources as you can. They even have the practice tests online for free, so if you didn’t want to pay for as many applications or books, you could take the tests online (but they don’t have the Hazard Perception test online).

Step 6: Take (and pass) the Theory test. You get given a set of instructions to follow the day of your test, and these include not bringing anyone with you to the test (Sorry Tim!), turning your phone off, and locking your phone, watch, tablet, handbag, jacket, and basically anything else you have with you in a provided locker. The only thing you are permitted to take into the testing room is your provisional license and the key to the locker.

The test starts out with a short 15-minute maximum practice session just to get you used to the way the test is conducted. Then, the computer gives you a timed 1-minute break (But you can skip ahead) before starting the theory test. The test is 50 questions long, and you have 57 minutes. You can flag questions you are unsure of and then at the end you can either review your entire test or just review your flagged questions. At the end, the test will also tell you if you failed to answer a question, so make sure you check! You need to get at least 43 questions correct, so I flagged the questions I wasn’t 100% on and at the end I had only flagged 5. If I had all 5 of those wrong, I still would have passed the test. But I went back and in the end I only had 2 questions I was unsure on. After you click the final submit button, it gives you a three-minute break (you can skip this or take less than three, but after three minutes it will move on to the Hazard test).

Just like the Theory test, the Hazard perception test will give you an example/practice test, then a one-minute break before starting the test. The Hazard part is 14 clips and each clip is probably around a minute long. You just click when you see the hazard developing.

When you’re done, you get up and leave the room and your print out with your score will be waiting for you with the receptionist.

And check out my score! *one* question wrong on the Theory, and 65/75 on the Hazard perception! They break down the score for you, so I know I scored 9 points on the double hazard, and then mostly 5s and 4s, with only 2 points on two of the hazards.

Passed my theory test with flying colours!!!!! #drivingtheorytest #drivingontheoppositeside #dvla

A photo posted by Rebecca L (@beccajanestclair) on Mar 9, 2016 at 7:16am PST

Step 7 is of course, scheduling, taking, and passing the Practical. Watch this space!

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The contents of this post, including images are © Rebecca J Lockley and Tim Lockley unless otherwise stated and should not be reproduced without permission. If you are not reading this on http://blog.beccajanestclair.com, my facebook page, Networked Blogs, the RSS feed(s), or through an e-mail subscription, please notify me.

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I’m hosting a Scentsy ONE DAY ONLY sale! Save up to 75%!! Use my link and I can earn free stuff too! https://wicklesskaren.scentsy.co.uk/?partyId=265221728

This post is inspired by It All Comes Together in the End AKA How I Met Your Father. The post was a list of the series of events that happened in her life that led towards her meeting her husband. Her events started when she was in college, but looking back, I think the events that led me to meeting Tim actually started all the way back in high school…..

When I was 14, I had a crush on a boy named Harlan. Yes, I can admit it now, and let’s be honest – who didn’t know I had a crush on him back then? He probably knew, too (or at least now he does. Hi Harlan! LOL) The internet was slowly becoming popular, but before there was the internet, there were BBSes. And Harlan just happened to run one. I managed to convince my mom that we needed a modem and somehow roped Harlan into coming over one day to install it and show me how to use it. So, thanks Harlan, for installing my modem!

Through BBSing I met a lot of people I probably wouldn’t have met otherwise. A lot of these people are some of my closest friends, but that’s a story for another time. The important thing to remember is that I met people and started talking with a kid I used to know when I was younger, named Dave. Years later, Dave decided to go by his first name, Malcolm, and he and I dated for about a year. Through Malcolm, I reconnected with some of the old BBSing crowd I hadn’t seen in ages. Thanks, Malcolm.

Flash forward another few years. I was hanging out with one of my old BBSing friends, Mike, when he started to tell me about a new IRC network he and some friends had started. He asked me if I would be interested in checking it out, and suggested I join #schlock_mercenary, a channel for fans of the web comic of the same name. Through this channel, I made friends with even more people. Thanks, Mike.

One of the people I met was a guy named Brent. Brent and I would privately chat about everything and anything and one day he suggested I check out this other channel, #crfh, because he thought I would fit in with the crowd of people there. #crfh was a channel for fans of the webcomic, College Roommies From Hell!!!. As it turned out, he was right. I fit in quite well there. Thanks, Wulfy.

If you’re a girl in a male-dominated geeky world, you tend to wind up dating quite a few of the guys you’ve met. I’ll be honest. I probably “dated” about a half a dozen boys I met through #crfh. Some of them I actually met in person, some of them were online relationships only as they never reached the meeting each other point. At one point, I wound up talking to a kid named Charlie who happened to live not-so-far away from me and he asked me out. We started dating, and at the same time the channel was planning a big meet (BoardieCon) in Seattle. Because I was dating Charlie and wanted to meet some of the people I knew through these channels, I decided to go. While there, I met one of the men I had been talking to for around a year. His name was Tim, and he was British. We hit it off immediately when we chatted online because of my love for the UK and my hope to someday live there. We spent a little bit of time together at BoardieCon, but I was also there with my boyfriend (the above mentioned Charlie), so it’s not like we could have gone off together if we wanted. I do remember getting mad at him and another man from our group for ditching us all to go ride trains for a day while I was stuck making swords out of foam with my boyfriend, though.

Charlie and I broke up, and through a series of miscommunications (to put it nicely), a lot of the people from the chat channel started disliking me and saying nasty things about me. But not Tim. He remained a steadfast friend. I started seeing another guy from the channel, Alex. Alex lived in Michigan, so it was a long drive to see him, but we got along well and for around two years, Alex and I had some sort of pseudo-relationship. When Alex moved out to Seattle for a job, we “broke up” for lack of a better way to describe it. The break up happened right before I was going down to Florida to visit my cousin, Missy, and to go on Ships and Dip III. This Tim fellow told me that he would be there for me and anytime I needed to talk I only had to call (long distance across an ocean, but still!). My cousin told me she thought he was sweet for offering. Thanks Alex.

After I got back from the cruise, Tim and I got closer and closer. His village finally had high speed internet and we started talking more and more over Skype…having real conversations not just typing to one another. Over the course of six months or so, I fell in love.

To be honest, everything that happened after that moment seems to have passed in a blur. I came out to visit for 6 months, thanks to my friend Linz for being able to organize my flight after my first flight got cancelled. I went home. Tim visited me. My mom and I visited him. We got engaged and got married on Bonfire Night. We filled out visa paperwork and I moved to the UK 10 weeks after we got married. Today we celebrate our 4th wedding anniversary, but we constantly say that it feels like we’ve been together longer than that because we just fit.

So looking back, I have to thank a little girl (me) for having a crush on a boy she met through drama club. Isn’t it funny when you look back on things?

(There are also probably several other previous relationships to thank for where I am now, but if I start listing everyone we could be here for a while…..Greg, Dave H, Dave S, Dave G, Dave McN, Dave who’s last name I forgot, Tom, He-Who-Will-Not-Be-Named, That kid who was in jail, That one I don’t want to admit to having been with, that other one who’s name I’ve actually forgotten, the first boy I dated when I was 14…was that Stephen?….John, Jason, James, at least one guy named Mike…Uhm, did I mention this would get to be a long list?)

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The contents of this post, including images are © Rebecca J Lockley and Tim Lockley unless otherwise stated and should not be reproduced without permission. If you are not reading this on http://blog.beccajanestclair.com, my facebook page, Networked Blogs, the RSS feed(s), or through an e-mail subscription, please notify me.

[LJ readers reading this on the LJ RSS feed: Please click on the link at the top of the entry to go directly to my blog to leave a comment, as comments left on the LJ RSS do not get seen by me. Facebook users reading this from my Networked Blogs link can either comment on facebook or on my blog. If you are reading this through an e-mail subscription, you might need to go directly to my blog to view videos and images.]

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